#39. Jones Soda

In November of 2005 I submitted some of my photography to Jones Soda Company to possibly have my pictures on somebody's soda bottle label. Of course I never got enough votes so none of them were ever seen by anybody high up, and were never chosen. Today I found them online and decided to post a few more photos I've taken over the years, just to see what happens. So I figured I'd post my links here and if you would like to see my soda labels and vote, that would be amazing.

#38. Soap In Your Teeth

It's been a long while since I've written anything on my blog. I guess I've been more internal with my thoughts and haven't taken the time to write them down. Also I've had a migraine for something like 3 or 4 months now and that tends to complicate life quite a bit.

I've also had a few comments of fire thrown at me that I haven't put the time in to answer. I don't mind the fact that people disagree with me. In a world with so many people, it's inevitable that several will have a different view than me. The thing that is just annoying is the cussing. I don't mind a good civil argument...but when you aren't educated enough to use real words to express your feelings, I don't have a lot of respect for you. I'm sure I'll still get cussed out, but know that I will censor your comments and repost them with expletives deleted as I don't allow that kind of content on my page. If your comments are plainly cussing with no other content or statements that if I deleted expletives there would be no other words, I will simply delete your comment fully.

To be honest, I used to have a large potty mouth myself. This is why I have such strong hate for cussing. I don't rent movies with ratings for cussing and do my best to stear clear of it. I find that if I hear a lot of swears, my mind is constantly polluted and it is easier in a moment of frustration for me to give in and say something hurtful rather than bite my tongue or use words that are more constructive. I was an angry hurful person for a large portion of my younger years. I had an angry mentality for so long that I have to be careful to not fall back into my old ways as it is a lot of work to grow out of being that nasty. It's easy to slip and fall, but so much more rewarding to grab onto God's hand and take this journey with Him away from who I was. So I will accept His help and continue on.

And because God can say things a WHOLE lot better than I can, here is one of my favorite chunks of scripture:

"How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water." - James 3:5-12

One thing I'd like to point out is that no man can tame his own tongue, but God can. God has redeemed us from the worst of sins through Christ and is the key to walk away from hurtful words.

Surgery is OVER

So I had my procedure on Friday where they moved my Septum to gain access to my sinus pathways and widen them, then they drained out the chronic sinus infection. So hopefully I'm done with sinus infections FOREVER! We'll see! At least with the chronic ones we're hoping.

I'm in pain of course, as comes with the consequence of having an operation. All I remember of the actual event was the prep, the lousy gown with the gaping backside (not attractive), laying on a surgical table and being covered with heavy blankets, and then waking up in a chair thing in a separate room. I have no idea how they moved me into a chair...but whatever. I don't need to know everything, nor do I want to know everything. I was just glad to put my own clothes back on after eating some graham crackers! (Oh, and they were kind enough to find me a shot to deal with a migraine I got from not eating because I had to fast for the surgery. Thank the Lord for hospitals having multiple kinds of meds on hand!)

I'm super out of it right now, but feel like writing because I'm so bored! I might regret that later, and doubt this will come out very coherant. Still, it gives me a task to do whilst sitting and healing in the green comfy recliner I've glued myself to for the next while. (I have to sleep sitting up, so the recliner is my option for that. I will probably lean back and nap again in just a few moments also, as I've barely slept much the past few days).

I also have this funny looking "sling" wrapped around my ears like a face mask, placed under my nose. I was supposed to be able to take it off yesterday, but I'm still dripping and wiping my nose hurts like none other, so leaving the gauze under my nose to catch any drips is the least pained option. Plus, it means when people look at me they don't see nasty drips every once in a while from my nose. It's kinda' nasty, but it does it's job. I'm glad I'm not a gauze strip though. Sure am glad.

I don't know when my body will let me breathe through my nose again and when I'll stop dripping. I also have no idea when I will be able to sing again. I miss that! Laughing I miss too. If you know me, you know I love to laugh....that's just me. It's weird not being able to laugh like normal. Instead I just kinda' make weird noises that are almost like fake laughing and my smile is half dead looking. It's attractive I'm sure, thankfully I have not seen this look in a reflection, so I do not have to be scarred by the hottness. So I'm hoping to laugh normally soon! I watched "Dan in Real Life" last night with my family and Bryant, and felt so weird letting out these silly sounds. But it was as close to my normal laugh as I can get right now. Anyway, I am nervous about the singing. I have no idea how my voice even sounds talking-wise because I just sound like a girl with a bad cold because my nose is stuffed with packing still. Time will tell! I'll report as soon as I know anything I'm sure. And I know God has everything taken care of. No matter what happens, I was blessed to be able to sing for Him for 21 great years. Lessons will be learned. I just am still hoping and praying to be able to sing the same, if not better.

Ok goodnight. I'm falling asleep writing this now. Nap time for this lady.

#36. The Ringing Bell

Recently I have been thinking in bits here and there about the sovereignty of God. That He is fully good, and in a confusing way, bad things have to happen because we let sin into this world. He lets these things happen because we chose the life of sin and pain over a life with Him. Pretty lame of us eh?

These thoughts popped up again through a great song by Derek Webb (found free on noisetrade.com, fully legal) called "This Too Shall Be Made Right". It is a great great song, read or download or both:

"People love you the most for the things you hate
And hate you for loving the things that you cannot keep straight
People judge you on a curve
And tell you you’re getting what you deserve
And this too shall be made right

Children cannot learn when children cannot eat
Stack them like lumber when children cannot sleep
Children dream of wishing wells
Whose waters quench all the fires of hell
And this too shall be made right

The earth and the sky and the sea are all holding their breath
Wars and abuses have nature groaning with death
We say we’re just trying to stay alive
But it looks so much more like a way to die
And this too shall be made right

There’s a time for peace and there is a time for war
A time to forgive and a time to settle the score
A time for babies to lose their lives
A time for hunger and genocide
And this too shall be made right

I don’t know the suffering of people outside my front door
I join the oppressors of those who i choose to ignore
I’m trading comfort for human life
And that’s not just murder it’s suicide
And this too shall be made right"


Soooooooo good! It points out where there are so many awful things in the world, but the hope, that "This too shall be made right." So even though we all have struggles day to day, God will "Wipe every tear from [our] eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things [will have] passed away." (Revelation 21:4) This is one of my favorite verses, and I'm stoked the song highlights the hope God brings through Christ!

So for me personally, that means no more crazy sicknesses popping up all over the place! Such an encouragement! Our time on earth is so short compared to eternity in Heaven with God Himself, it brings me so much joy to think of how soon this will all be over and I will feel no more pain! This was something I really needed to hear today. I have a month before surgery and today the symptoms of my sinus infection are quite brutally painful. A month will seem like a simple blink of time after a while. So, thanks God so much for your reminders through great songs and your word!

#35. Surgical-ifragilisticexpialidocious.

I just returned home from an appointment with my Ear/Nose/Throat doctor. I've had a chronic sinus infection for 2 whole months now, moving onto my third. (A repeat problem from past years). I've completed 3 whole rounds of antibiotics and am on a harsh fourth round! So I was pretty sure that this year, they would tell me surgery is happening. (Last year the infection miraculously disappeared on the pre-op scan, but because the infections keep returning, we need to widen my sinus pathways.) So that's that. Surgery.

I think I'd be more scared if I hadn't already had my wisdom teeth removed. So I know what it's like to be under complete anesthesia, though I don't like the idea of people cutting at my insides and moving them around. Either way, I have no choice. It's not like this infection will go away on its own, and if I want to have a future where I hopefully don't get infections for months at a time, this is how to get that.

My biggest concern, however, is singing. Singing is so important to me. It's one of the best ways in my mind to express my thanks and love to God. With the surgery, they will alter the size of my sinus passages and change the resonance of my voice. I don't know how hard or easy it will be to retrain, or learn how to use the revised instrument. There are a ton of unknowns, and I'm just scared that I won't know how to sing the way I love.

I think the hardest thing for me in the next month, as I prepare for surgery, will be to be at rest in giving my voice and the unknowns to God. God is in control and I know that whatever happens will have some amazing lessons in store for me, no matter what. That still doesn't make it quite easy to say "sure, cut me up and quite possibly wreck one of my favorite things." It's just that if I don't do this, I'll wreck even more. Hopefully I won't have to deal with these chronic infections and won't miss work, won't have to be at home resting all the time, and can really invest more of myself in other things I love (such as my amazing students!).

So please just pray with me in this, that I would be able to sing well after surgery. Also pray I don't go blind or die, as that could also happen. Yeah.....cool. Those are intensely rare though, so I'm mostly just worried about the inevitable voice variances.

All in all, since surgery has to wait until available openings in early January, as long as I can sing I will do as much as I can! Seriously I plan to live this month as a singing machine, giving it all up and throwing it out at my bedroom walls. It's the most intimate worship for me, and I just long for that so much. I will use the time I for sure have with this gift from God. I don't sing super well right now anyway with my blocked and plugged nose, but it's what I've got, and that's what I'll use.

Now to post a passage of scripture I very much so need to read for myself, which has also been a favorite of mine since childhood when I started really reading the Bible for myself:

25 "Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? 28And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31Therefore do not be anxious, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

34 "Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."

-Matthew 6

#34. Congratulations to the Happy Couple!!

It's official, Christianna and Micah's wedding on Saturday was the most amazing/adorable wedding I've ever witnessed personally! It was done the way weddings should be! (Totally devoted to God). I was stoked for them! It's so great to see a couple so strong in the Lord and through that so wholly devoted to each other! It was a flood of emotion and joy and so so so fun! I am so thankful for them letting me share in their special day! I wish I had pictures of the adorable ceremony to share, but I figured it would be tacky to take photos with my cell phone, and decided to just sit back and celebrate photoless.

Sadly, I did not finish my HUGE painting project in time. I have two of the three paintings complete for them. I will finish the last sometime in the next couple weeks, as I heal from my 2 month long sinus infection. Thankfully I have some time until I see them to hand over the final project. So I am able to make everything polished. Bryant and I went on a super long hunt for frames to fit my paintings, and nothing seemed to work. I am debating on getting a glassless frame, to make sure they fit. Thick canvas is HARD to frame, let me tell ya'. Without going custom, it's a tough find. I did find some frames from the drug store, thinking they would fit, I got them on a whim for the nice price, and then it didn't work. I have yet to try framing them without the glass intact though, so that's another option I'm willing to look at still. I will give them a matte varnish anyway, so glass or no glass, the paintings should stand up to dust and other things.

Anyway, here is a preview of the finished projects:

Micah's portrait is one of Christianna's favorite pictures of him. The background is a wash of his favorite color (blue).


Christianna's portrait is one of Micah's favorite photos of her. The background, like Micah's, is her favorite color (purple). Her wedding color is Lilac, so I did my best to get a ton of lilac shades mixed in there.

The third image is currently just a background. It is a wash of half blue and half purple, blended quite nicely in my opinion. I love the effect and am so excited to see how it turns out when I paint on one of their favorite photos of the two of them together. It's supposed to show the unity of marriage and the two becoming one. Yep. I'm pretty stoked!!! I'll post the finished product on my Deviant Art gallery. This has taken so many hours but I am hoping it will be cherished for years. If not, I still loved the project and am so thrilled with my experiements in pop-art! It was so much fun!

#33. Schmolitics

Well, that's that. Attack advertisements are GONE! No more McCain/Palin vs. Obama/Biden! No more Gregoire vs. Rossi, Darcy Burner vs. Reichart. No matter where you stand in the races, you are glad about this right? I know I am! For some reason politics make me cranky. I get irritated and uptight and just can't stand to discuss them without getting all fired up. I used to just ignore everything in hopes that it would solve the anxiety I get. That didn't work at all. Now that I actually try to pay attention when I can actually do something that might count, like vote, I still get antsy about everything. I just like it to be "over", and that won't happen, so I might as well do what I can cause I'm out of ideas of what else to do. Either way, I still don't dream of becoming a politician ever in any dimension or parallel universe.

As far as the president goes, I wasn't sure I'd be happy no matter who won. Why do two options get the whole press attention and none of the independents? I had never even heard of the Constitution Party until the voter's pamphlet, and loved what I saw, but had never heard anything else so wasn't sure what the candidate's track record was at all. Why ignore candidates just because they don't have as much money as the Republicans and Democrats? People are afraid to vote for the independents because everybody thinks they can't win. Though, if the other leaders were given the time of day, and if people dropped their ways of voting only with their party rather than what the candidate stands for individually, they would have a chance. Why is nothing being done about this? There are so so many sides to every argument, not just two. So why are we willing to settle for two opposing candidates only, when they might not match up with our specific beliefs? I just see this as a major flaw. We pretend the others have a chance, but with the way things have been running, I don't foresee a winner of an independent party anytime soon.

(Time for me to get back to painting! I'm working on a project for a good friend of mine and her fiance!! I'm doing a series of three paintings, and I'm quite proud of them! The only problem, I have to finish 1/3 of one painting and 3/3 of the third and last painting still! I'm hoping to finish the project before their wedding in 10 days. We shall see if that happens or not. I'll post pictures after the couple has received them.)